I'm really sorry to hear the Jay, its not easy losing something as dear as that.
Stay strong! (:
I know that it hurts. I've lost someone, too. More than one.
The pain attenuates when you find a viable reason to be happy, to honor the one you've lost, or to immerse yourself in the living--to remember that joy is something you can still feel and have a right to feel, just as much if not more so than the pain. Try doing some charity work, farmhand volunteering, or gardening. It really helps. Animals; keep lots of them around, even if you don't like them! (As long as they're not the sort to stress you unreasonably.)
Talking about it doesn't always help, or writing about it. But yes, time, in fact, DOES heal.
There is something good waiting.
We're here for you, and we're rooting for you. <3
R.I.P.
(Also, if anyone gives you a hard time, and say that it is because they believe that suicide is "the easy way out..." What they don't understand is that suicide becomes an option when coping mechanisms no longer work, or the hurt one person is feeling extends beyond their coping abilities. Just remember that these people who might make fun of this person, and of you for supporting and loving them--for not deriding or chiding them, have likely thought of doing the same thing, but are afraid to admit it. They lack security, or comprehension skills, but your special someone, and you, are priceless, even in death. Never forget that we love you, and cherish you. We always will.)